Category Frenemies

I sometimes wonder if social networking is damaging to our social lives.  When friendships have drifted apart and couples have moved on, we’re left with questions like, Should I delete them?  Should I delete their sister/brother/parent even though I get on with them really well?  Is it too soon to delete them?  Should I comment/like their status?  Would it be weird if I did?  There are so many questions, and no right or wrong answer.

Before the days of social media, when friends drifted apart, that was it.  But when you have someone on a social networking site, the possibility of rekindling past relationships will always be there unless you–or they–make the move to remove that friendship from cyber space as well as your mind...

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What do you mean to me?
Someone I don’t speak to,
someone I barely see?

Why do you act like you care?
When you say nothing,
and you’re so seldom there?

Why do I bother with you?
When you’re naive and selfish,
Only doing what you have to.

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Look at you,
So pretty and popular,
All the guys are reaching
for their binoculars.

Have a good look,
the beauty won’t last,
It will be just like our friendship -
a thing of the past.

Your head is empty -
you like it that way -
You’ve become so boring
with nothing to say.

You’re just a face,
a body, no soul,
That’s why you were a bitch,
why you acted so cold.

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One of the core beliefs I was raised with was that being in a relationship wasn't the be-all and end-all. If I found a decent guy, then that was great, but if I didn't, then it didn't matter - I'd always have my independence and whatever career I chose to fall back on. Now, it just so happens that I've found a great guy. I got lucky. But because I was raised with the belief that I shouldn't bother wasting my time with assholes, idiots or boring people, I waited until I found someone that, like Blair with Chuck, I could see as not only my equal, but also my opposite - the yin to my yang.

However, almost every TV show I've ever seen that has female leads seems to have the insatiable desire to marry them off (or at least have them in a serious relationship) by the time it ends. The three ones that I've watched the most and that annoyed me the most with their final storylines were Charmed, Gossip Girl and Sex and the City.Read More

This was inspired by Taylor Swift’s I Knew You Were Trouble. (yes, I am obsessed with that song), as well as past and present events.

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Shame on me
for believing your bullshit.
I knew you were trouble
but I trusted you anyway,
Convinced myself
you were here to stay.

I gave you chances,
I lapped up your lies,
Ignored the truth,
Even though it was written
in your eyes.

I still beat myself up
even though it’s you
that fucked up.
I still blame myself
for my naivety.
I still wonder
how I was so stupid
how I was so right
yet forced myself to be
so wrong.

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Generally, when I write about things in blog form, I speak vaguely. I don't go into huge amounts of detail about things that have happened to me - that's what my fiction and counselling is for. Sometimes, however, real life can outdo fiction. Or even feel like it is fiction.Read More

“I knew you were trouble when you walked in,So shame on me now,Flew me to places I’ve never been,‘Til you put me down…Now I’m lying on the cold, hard ground.”

Out of all of the songs on Taylor Swift’s Red, my favourite one, and the one that I can relate to the most – with the exception of Stay Stay Stay – is I Knew You Were Trouble.  You see, I have this horrible habit of knowing exactly what a person is like from the moment I meet them (you may call that judgemental, I call that instinct and being right), but I choose to ignore it (I call this part stupidity).  It doesn’t just happen with guys.  In fact, it happens more with friends than with guys.  Most girls, they go on and on about how they pick the wrong guys.  How they constantly get screwed over...

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Is it just me that gets all nostalgic when times are tough?  Whenever I’m feeling low, I have the insatiable, masochistic urge to look through past photos, past writings (fiction, blog posts and diary entries), and achieve nothing more than making myself feel worse.  Sometimes I make myself feel worse because I’m in a worse situation now than I was in then; sometimes it’s because I realise how much of an idiot I was when I was insert age here.  Why do we do it?

More specifically, why do I do it?  Am I really that much of a masochistic/idiot?

Don’t answer that.

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I’ve been having some…issues, with some of my friends recently.  Well, one in particularly.  I’m not going to go into detail because that’s not my style, but poetry, on the other hand, is.

You say you’re going to do things,
but then you never do,
You say that you care about me,
but then where the hell are you?

You say that we’re close friends,
but then you treat me like a stranger,
Are you sure that it’s been
twenty two years we’ve known each other?

There’s so much going on in your life,
that you never have time for mine,
You don’t know how much it hurts
that you never have the time.

You haven’t treated me like a friend
in a really long time,
so why am I still bothering
when all that matters to you
is you?

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I just created a thread on Artificial Sweetener about memories from school, and it made me realise something: I have very few good ones.  The old saying that your school years are the best years of your life never applied to me, and I still don’t believe it.  Despite everything that happened in my life, if I was ever given the chance, I’d never go back there.

We live just around the corner from it, and if I want to go out anywhere I have to go past it, but I never feel sad when I go past.  Never nostalgic.  If I feel anything – which is rare, these days – I feel angry.  Annoyed.  Guilty.  Mostly at myself.

I had the opportunity to move schools, to start somewhere new, but I never took it...

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